The Death of Krowell
by loosingletters
Summary: Weldeschtein Krom Raggs was there when his youngest brother died, overwhelmed by memories he wasn't supposed to have gained and cast out by a father who didn't want to live with the shame. Or: Krom's last talk with Krowell before he left Raggs.


**I have so many feelings about Ayanami? So this happened.**  
 **Also because I wanted to write some big bro Krom.**

"Krowell? Are you alright?"

Krom watched his little brother in worry. Ever since they had returned from Barsburg, his already withdrawn brother had closed himself off even more, he barely interacted with the rest of the family anymore. The only one he still seemed to talk to was his friend Yukikaze.

Sometimes Krom saw both of them scurrying through the library, borrowing mythology books as well as fairy tales. A little strange and out of character for the usually so serious Krowell, who had always regarded myths as unnecessary and childish.

"Where are you going?"

Slowly Krowell turned around, violet eyes flashing with badly hidden pain.

"Just to the gardens," Krowell replied hesitantly.

"In the middle of the night?" Krom asked and took a step forward. Seeing that his brother wasn't moving, Krom crossed the distance between them entirely and came to a halt right in front of his brother. "And with a bag?"

Krowell was still a one and a half heads smaller than him, unlike Kreuz who, despite being younger, had always been nearly Krom's height and was more of a twin than a little brother.

Krowell appeared so young and frail compared to them, wise beyond his age and strong enough to be tutored alongside his brothers for most of his life despite their age differences. Nevertheless Krom worried. Krowell was still a child and as his older brother, and for once not as the crown prince, it was Krom's duty to look out for him.

Krom opened up his arms and carefully pulled his younger brother into a hug. Krowell tensed at first but then eased into the embrace, going as far as resting his head on Krom's shoulder.

"You know you can talk to me about everything, right? And Kreuz too, he worries enough about us as it is."

"Ich bin Verloren, Krom," Krowell whispered in old Raggs. _[I'm Verloren, Krom]_

"Eh? You're not lost. You know the castle better than me and Kreuz together and you can always come to us if there's something wrong," Krom replied calmly while wondering what he had missed in Krowell's life that as a result he made his brother feel alone like this.

"You misunderstood me. I'm _Verloren_."

Krom frowned. That sounded impossible, ridiculous and he'd think it a joke if not for the way Krowell's hands dug into his shirt. "So what? You're still my brother-"

"I've been exiled from Raggs by the king," Krowell interrupted him. "I'll be going to Barsburg together with Yukikaze and join the military."

Then Krowell pulled away from Krom, fixed his appearance and looked his older brother straight into his eyes.

"Please don't attempt to stop me."

"Krowell-"

"Brother, please. I have to be gone by sunrise and I'd like to have passed the border by then."

Krom mustered his brother, took in the dark circles around his eyes, the trembling of his hands and how hard he forced himself to breath flatly. Then Krom reached behind his neck and took off the necklace he was wearing, only to put it around Krowell's neck.

"What are you doing-"

"Give this back to me when you can come home," Krom said smiling. "It's a promise, alright?"

Krowell nodded and then turned around. He lingered in that position for a while before raising his left arm and rubbing over his eyes with the back of his hand. Then he marched forward, away from his brother and towards his friend waiting for him at the end of the hall.

And with that Wahrheit Krowell Raggs died.

 **Okay so, imagine you're a 14 year old and get hit by the fact that you're a freaking death god who is to blame for the death of the only person he loved and now everyone hates you and also God - who you know is real - killed you, never mind that there is something wrong with your mind, you are still confused by love as a concept and your father throws you out of your home and you're left alone to cope with that? I'm sure he had a hella hard time, nightmares, trauma and everything else included.**

 **Even though I don't agree with the stuff Ayanami did, I feel very sorry for Krowell and want to keep this smol baby safe.**  
 **Also nobody can tell me that Krom didn't know who killed him and that old Raggs wasn't German - fight me.**  
 **And Ayanami probably did feel some familial attachment to Teito (the whole coat thing?) and Krowell actually did love his family before his life got messed up by memories he shouldn't have gained.**  
 **So, Krom named Teito after his precious little brother, that's a thing here too.**  
 **And for those that didn't get it, "verloren" (adjective) is german for "lost".**

 **I'm wondering if I should continue this. Maybe some good end or the canon bad end. Well, depends on you.**  
 **Thanks for reading! I'd love to hear what you think!**


End file.
